I use the Frog analogy all the time. You know, the one about the frog in boiling water. If you throw him into boiling water, he will jump out. Duh. BUT if you put him in cool water and very, very slowly turn up the heat, he will boil alive.
I was the frog for years. The heat turned up so slowly I didn't even notice that I was being boiled alive. That I was crumbling underneath the weight of life. That everything around me was so toxic it was deadly.
I hate the word "toxic". It's such a ridiculous buzzword at this point. "Toxic narcissists" everywheres! Lets all armchair diagnose everyone else!
I will, however, unapologetically remove any and all toxicity from my life. If anyone feels I am toxic to them, please remove me as well.
I say that not because I don't care about people but because I know that we can unwittingly become bad for others.
Maybe this is my naivety. Maybe this is what is fundamentally wrong with my life. My belief that people (for the most part as I don't know a lot of sociopaths that I am aware of) are generally just doing the best they can. That people don't set out to destroy anyone else. That people are generally just trying to find their way and inadvertently hurt others on the way there. I know I have. I know I have also put the weight of my expectations on other people and have hurt them unfairly. I didn't do it intentionally, but unintentional pain still hurts the same.
Jump out of the damn water. Sometimes it's simple and sometimes it's life altering and shattering. Do it anyways. Short term destruction is better than long term soul crushing. You can do anything for a year. Or for a month. Or for how long it takes. You are strong enough. Trust me. I lived through the last 18 months- you can do it too.
